Last year I touched on experiencing loneliness since becoming a mama. I feel now I’ve learnt to cope better when I’m alone and I’d like to share how I’m getting through it.
Social Media
Social media has helped me, although it can sometimes be the cause of feeling “meh” about myself – I suggest taking a break occasionally – but, just by sharing how you feel on social media, you’ll most likely find yourself connecting with other parents, or non parents, feeling the same. For me personally, I find writing to be my outlet for almost everything, so when I feel myself feeling alone, I just write my thoughts away.
Embracing “Alone” Time
Similar to my previous point about writing my thoughts away. When I’m alone and starting to feel lonely, I try to do things that I wouldn’t usually do when I’m surrounded by people. I guess my more private hobbies. For me that’s writing, reading other peoples blogs, drawing, sewing and many more creative outlets.
Other examples can be found in my 5 top tips for self care post, but embracing alone time can be in any way you like and doing things you either wouldn’t usually do when surrounded by people – like dancing around to your favourite songs, or things you don’t usually have time do – like taking a peaceful bath or reading a book!
Being More “Hands On”
I’m not saying that I’m not “hands on” when it comes to parenting. If anything I’m quite the opposite when I’m at home on my own with the girls. What I mean by “hands on” is that whatever activities we decide to do, be it colouring or making things with play doh – I get stuck in 100%. This way I’m fully concentrating on the girls and the activity – which means I’m not sat on the sofa feeling guilty for not playing with them and being stuck in my own head – if you know what I mean?!
I guess the biggest thing really is to just find a distraction of some sort. Surround yourself with things you love, find a positive mindset as much as you can and talk to someone if you can – I’ve actually been known to answer the phone knowingly to “cold callers” just for someone to talk to for 5 minutes.
If you’re reading this and you’re feeling, or have been feeling lonely, please do pop me a comment or even an email just for a chat. My inbox is always open for anyone.
Sometimes alone time can be really nice if it’s something like a bubble bath! Loneliness can be really hard though.
Being a new Mum can be very lonely. I remember feeling lost when my partner went back to work after my first daughter was born. All of your suggestions are spot on.